Posts tagged ‘real love’

November 13, 2010

First loves and true security

by Veronika

I’ve never had a first love. But I have had a first crush. It was weird, when it happened. I suddenly realized I thought he was “so cute!” and I loved the sound of his voice. In fact, that’s what got me – his voice.

Like most crushes, nothing came of it, and in fact, I doubt he does or ever will know that I was interested in him. That’s okay. He doesn’t need to know, because he’s not the one God’s planned for me.

But have you ever had one of those “first loves” that makes you stay awake at night and just pine after him? You get the flutter-butters in your stomach and you have such a hard time looking him in the eye? And if he returns your affection, well then…you might as well go order the dress now.

Eventually, though, you realized that it wasn’t real. It was pure adrenaline, a plunge-in head-first fantasy that wasn’t made of anything truly deep or steadfast. You made up ideas about that person that “just had to be true” because you created and believed in them so long, they became real. And before you know it, you’ve given a piece of your heart away, and then another, then another. Before you know it, you’ve forgotten what true love looks like – because you’ve forgotten the Person who demonstrates it to you every day.

In Day Three of Moments for Singles, Leigh affirms a truth many young ladies and women forget: “My first love is the One who “first loved me, the One who has kept on loving me through every other love of my life” (emphasis added). God is a jealous God. He wants your affection…but He loves you anyway, even when your heart is bound to someone else. He loves you. Passionately. Devotedly. Eternally.

“Receiving the love of God,” Leigh says, “does not mean I renounce my desire to be married.” I think most of us struggle with this. “God!” we wail. “If I dedicate my entire life to You, that means that I’ll never, ever get married!”

No, dear ones, it doesn’t.

Leigh continues. “Receiving God’s love does not mean I renounce my desire to be married. It means that I feel secure in knowing that I am deeply loved today – right now!” You have the biggest “security blanket” the world can’t even fathom. You have the undying, never-ending, unquenchable PASSION of an almighty God, who, as St. Augustine said, “loves each of us as if there were only one of us”! As far as God’s concerned, you’re the only one He cares about. He’s passionate and jealous for you and you only. He’s your first love because He gave up His Son for you, and He’s your security because – unlike fleeting crushes and puppy loves – He’s never, ever going anywhere.

And that, to me, is worth my whole heart. I’m content to wait for His gift of a physical marriage in the meantime. Till then, I’ll seek to “love others as He first loved me” (ref. 1 John 4:19) 

Are you with me?

November 11, 2010

One half of a great pair of shoes…

by Veronika

Shoes just have to come as a pair!

You’re just a half. A missing chunk of something whole, or the second part of two. You know you have something great to give someone else, that you and he – together – are just going to be great.

Halves, after all, come in twos. That’s why they’re “halves.”

If you’re like me, you’ve been waiting for that second half to show up, that other shoe, that lead to your pencil, that ice cube to your tea, that root to your branches. You go together with something. You always have. And when they’re taking their time revealing themselves, you feel like you’re lost.

That other half, believe it or not, is not in the form of a physical person. You’re not just made up of the physical; you are also made up of the spiritual. And it’s the spiritual half that you’re lacking. Man and woman can bond physically; they can bond emotionally; and sometimes, when all’s right in the world and the sun is shining, they can bond intellectually.

(That’s a joke. Har, har.)

But man and woman cannot bond spiritually…at least at the outset. The spiritual understanding of a human only happens when they’ve bonded to something higher than themselves. When they’ve made contact with God.

That’s the other half of the really great pair of shoes you’re going to be a part of. When you’re connected to God with all your heart, with all of your being, you’re part of something spectacular. You’re part of something far greater – and far more eternal – than you can imagine.

The man that God might give you? He’s the added bonus. He’s the cute polka dots on the side, the silky scarf you found to match, the click-clacky sound that thrills you when you walk across the floor. He’s not what defines you. He’s what God decides to throw in when He’s ready. And he’ll match you perfectly. 

Until then, you’ve got a great pair of shoes to get you wherever God can take you – which is anywhere. With Him, you can encompass the world.

*Thanks to Leigh McLeroy for this awesome metaphor. I hope you don’t mind me taking that idea further, Leigh!